Avoiding Confrontation – By Tazim Elkington

As we consider the various aspects of mental anguish and imbalance, it is essential to acknowledge that most issues arise from our childhood. When unaddressed or unresolved we create more of the same and things go out of whack. When we understand that the symptoms that arise cannot be cured unless the core issues are unraveled and healed at the deepest level of the subconscious mind, only then can healing take place.

It is truly amazing when we consider how far we have come since discussions regarding ‘Conscious Parenting’ have been introduced. However, let’s be realistic – this type of parenting will take time before becoming the norm. Before we can become ‘Conscious Parents,’ we first have to work on ourselves as fractured adults who grew up without this type of parenting. Only then can we help our kids be different parents compared to ourselves and previous generations.

Most parents think that by reading, listening to videos and clips and attending online classes they will become conscious parents. That information is mostly on the ‘how’ not on the ‘what’ and ‘why’ the adult of today must do to first clear their own baggage before they can become a conscious parent. It is not possible to do that unless you have sifted through, shifted your own inner gremlins and healed your own wounds and distortions.

Confrontation is one of those extraordinary aspects of our lives that no one wishes to confront (no pun intended).

Out of 100 people I engaged with, 99.5 were not only averse to confrontation, in fact they are terrified of it. Confrontation and Public Speaking are practically siblings! Why are people so afraid and nervous about confrontation?

The fact that we are conditioned from childhood that confrontation is ‘wrong’ and that one will hurt someone’s feelings, create chaos, disrespect or cause upheaval is a complete block to resolving issues.  The preference is to be dishonest, lacking in integrity and being a hypocrite. This way we can all live in collective disharmony with mounds of ridiculously unaddressed issues we are trying to hide and pretend all is well and lovely.

Let me enlighten you dear reader, these issues will not disappear like the rabbit in the magician’s hat. Until and unless we learn that ‘Confrontation is an opportunity to resolve and dissolve the past’ and move forward without that particular baggage we will not change the present nor the future narrative.I have dealt with hundreds of people who cannot resolve their mental health issues as they do not want to confront their inner baggage, or their unresolved childhood issues. This causes so much turmoil and affects the balance in our minds. Consulting a good therapist can assist you to resolve your past and change how you view confrontation. By the way, this can be accomplished without being mean and nasty and can in fact be a conversation when done without a need to go on the defense! Good luck with practicing this in your next encounter!

It’s time to really consider confrontation as a gift for resolutions!

Article written by:

Tazim Elkington

The Indian Black Butterfly Leadership Trainer, Speaker, Writer Hypnotherapist, Psychosomatic Therapist & Poet

 E:www.tazim.net 

W:tazim@tazim.net

T: +254714434574